SHOULD I CHECK TO SEE IF HE’S ONLINE OR NOT?

Every girl has experienced, shall we intentionally take ages to reply? Should we open it right away? Should we leave it for ages? Should we leave it the same amount of time he left it for me? Can we call him? Is that too forward? Can we call him more than once? (definitely not) If he’s not replying straight away shall we click his chat and see if he’s online?

Number 1. NO!… do anything but check to see if he’s online. If you find yourself wanting to click on his chat, for the life of you DON’T DO IT. End his chat, delete his number, lob your phone into the sea, do anything but resist the urge to check to see if he’s online. You are gaining absolutely nothing from doing this. If he’s online, then what? And if he’s not, then what? He will reply when he wants to and by you checking to see if he’s online will only wind you up. In life you send a message and then you get on with your life and if he replies then cool and if he doesn’t then it’s also cool. I understand we’re used to getting everything we want instantly in this generation and in this case it’s a reply we want but we’re only fixated on this because we want what we can’t have. You might even find yourself going crazy over someone you don’t even like because the idea of him playing hard to get has sparked up a mental challenge and instantly it makes you feel validated when he responds because you’ll get a rush of Dopamine (which is like a mental high) and then when all your energy is fixated on this reply, you’ll also feel shit when he doesn’t. The key is to LIVE YOUR LIFE.

Number 2. There is no point in calculating the time it’s taken him to respond to your message after he’s opened it, everyone moves to their own beat. There could be a thousand reasons to why he hasn’t replied yet. He’s either busy, not interested, playing hard to get or with another girl but that’s fine. If he’s busy, let him live, if he’s not interested that’s also fine, you want someone who is equally as interested in you as you are him, like ping pong, back and forth. If he’s playing hard to get then leave him to it, show that you too can play hard to get, but take it 1 step further and legit don’t let him get you haha! If he’s with another girl, then it’s his loss, spend 1 second dwelling on the weirdo then move on and live your life. There are plenty of guys who will give you their attention and give you what you deserve so don’t settle baby girl.

Number 3. Playing games on when to reply is also dumb, do you take years to reply to friends? Probably not, if you’re on your phone and he’s messaged then reply, going on and offline just to avoid looking keen is such a waste of time and energy and it’s actually just really annoying. Stop over-thinking it. And unless you have something to call him about then why are you calling him? Let him call you. If you’re busy and he’s messaged then carry on living your life and reply when you’re free. Do not make him a priority when you’re probably one of his many options. I know you’re probably thinking oh I just don’t wanna play games, this isn’t a game, this is you putting yourself first and LIVING YOUR LIFE! Your life doesn’t depend on whether or not he replies.

Number 4. Do not question your attractiveness based on whether or not he’s taking ages to reply, you haven’t done anything wrong, do not doubt yourself if someone isn’t interested, not everyone you meet are going to be the one, take your time, chill, it’s not you, you are enough, you are sassy, you are hella fly and you aren’t put on this earth to require validation from anyone but yourself.

And lastly imagine repeating this to someone; What you doing babe? Oh I’m just sitting here staring at a screen to see if this guy comes online? Why babe? To see if he’s online or not..Sounds crazy right? Don’t do it.

Thanks for reading,

LOVE DT XO

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